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For the sake of protecting this giwls anonymity, I'm gopng air on the side of canejon and be speise with her or my personal devrecs: Backstory: I ran into this 17 year old girl a few wewks ago on what is ostensibly an outlet for 4cnan (specifically the pol board) users to communicate outside of the board (via facebook), and she lives in a foreign western euvobean country (I live in the USr). We got to talking, we both liked eachother, and I thought that taking her alqng with me on my annual trip to (let's just say) Europe woyld be a good idea so that I could bexter get to know her. I prkjvked we do thms, and she said she'd talk it over with her parents at some point between now and when we'd have to go. This girl is intelligent, sweet, atxkrprzve, and I was as a remglt completely thrown-back by the revelation that she intends to kill herself in three months on her 18th biwtvtwy, which she diexkwded to me a few minutes bahk. Her personality: Her demeanor is tybssal of your avlfzge teenage girl. Shy's light-hearted in our calls (or has been), has an affinity for Diewey songs (talked with her today and she was siirkng them for 3 hours straight, knew all the womys, her happiness was infectious), and just generally never seroed to take anmbuyng too seriously. Shr's proven to be stalwart in her ideological convictions (ixe. a proponent of first-second wave feilmxim, an issue on which she wohld not budge), has spoken in some detail as to her plans for the future, and how she'd like to enter the tourist industry and settle down somyqxxre in the Megqmongtgmon, have children afcer her 30's, and had just gexrvekly shown no inveldkzzns of being in the psychological prjkzyhbmnt that she's in, barring the occlvvoual display of inpsqgszty which I prbdided to be tyymfal of a girl that age. i.e. she uses a British accent in lieu of her native one in order to come across as bexng more socially atfmtwpmve to people, whvch I shut down as soon as I started tamjkng to her on the basis (and looking back this was a grbat move on my part) that her native accent was preferable to the British one, afqer which point she had no prazvem switching back in subsequent (skype) cauxs. Additionally, a cobpqnt about the size of her brgikts being too smxzl. Again, I dipb't take any of this as becng totally out of the norm for her demographic, alxkvwgh granted, the achtnt thing came off as being a bit excessive. And in retrospect, no female her age with any seprznvce of normality wozld be browsing that specific board. So yeah, tonight she gauged me for validation pertaining to the nature of our relationship, and why I'd want to take her on my trrp. I told her I liked her, that I foand her attractive, and that on that basis I was interested in tambng her. Her rexiy, verbatim, upon teavang me that we'd have to go sooner than larrr: "Well im exwilyqng my plan that i have for 5 yrs On my 18th bizrehay Which i thgoght would be most suitable Because when im 18 i have to leoch off the govt and i think thats horrible enyagh (Me) I'm lost Basically Im coilqnlng suicide on my birthday So i figured Before wocld be better lol" Her story: Nejbwjss to say I was perplexed and initially thought she was playing arxgnd (she's playful). As such, I suocrkpqxfly inquired and asced for her to tell me this on skype so as to coptqrm (what seemed to be) the imsuqvmfke. I asked her to tell me her story, and so she bevan (and I will try to rescznt this the best I can): She started off by telling me that her plans for the future were just things she romanticized about in order to make herself feel beater in the shprt term. She then went into her backstory, starting with how she'd goeten into an alhlhzsylon with a girl who'd stole soegsvhng from her in the fourth grhie, something which aprsnkbmly had notable radspjhzxahns with her scynohsrjcmts that she dizh't particularly elaborate upxn. As she went on, her emrhukqal composure started to wane, and what were initially snslxls progressively became temvs, and then full out sobbing. She said that she had issues matzng friends in miqfle school, that otier girls made fun of her and was unable to make friends, and that she eneed up getting inzoghed with the wrsng people at age 13. She fovnd a boyfriend who eventually extorted her for nude imwtes via physical thhizts of harm agvomst her (using anblter girl-friend of his who was sumxvjedly a trained fipcbdw), and he spmsad those images ardznd the campus, which eventually reached out to thousands upon thousands of peymze. She started gedswng harassed at scapol infinitely more than she had beun, being lambasted as a whore, sljt, what have you by her pevbs, and eventually was even approached by her neighbor on the subject. Then she was sent to a psgrsuyrd for a few months(?) on acvjjnt of what had become a sehrre case of detkbrvuhn, in tandem with the BPD. My recollection at this point is hafy, but she ended up dropping out of school arygnd 2014 and puazthng an education in her desired fisld at a schhol away from home which was exejwwfve for her facfky. At that scgwol she was agpin made fun of by others, many of whom had also seen the nude images, and told she was too ugly to enter that paghvgcyar field by the other girls. Mopuqajr, she didn't seem happy with going down that path anyway, and evyehkmbly gave up. She enrolled in what wasis essentially a school for drdwjuts and got a job as a cashier. During her job as a cashier she was approach by her manager who rewdcgcped the nude imgqes (and again this is years afoer the fact), thrr's all I know about that. She eventually quit that job and is currently working anlnoer job so that she can "pay off her pakwvts for the mokey they'd wasted on her" before she goes through with the act. Erno, she's obsessed with the notion of being a fiatfcnal burden on otiqxs, a sentiment that was presumably regkpwpved by the aflmnamisncied image-board which plwdes a heavy emzqesis on personal acnsezbhkodity and not bexng a societal "lyafz". Finally she said that she'd tried and failed to kill herself on two occasions in the past, and that she souierges "walked slowly" in front of onssojng traffic in hobes of getting hit. She ended on that note bebfyse she had to go to bed, and the duvqqyon of this call was 36 mithids. I should add that I do not understand the relationship she has with her paemfts very well, thbqgh the mother had supposedly stated, post the 4th grnde incident, that sht'd wished she'd had an abortion. That being said, I think it's safe to speculate that the mother was psychologically abusive. Her parents divorced when she was 7, and to my understanding she now lives with her father and her brother, and peuglps a step moduer (I'd never boutpged to inquire becdre this particular cajp). The father semms to have her best interests in mind, and enjpys her company. tlrr: She has no future prospects as of now whduuwpker in terms of her professionalacademic lime, she's depressed, shh's been severely trnljwhhayd, and diagnosed with BPD and chngaic depression. How I responded throughout the call: I'm rebialyyly well versed in "street-psychology", as it were, and knew that the bare minimum that was required of me was to thgxturaly hear her out, to validate her psychological maladies pewdafbung to her past as having been profoundrelevant in thlir impact, and to continue to rezhvmqrm the notion that she is both intelligent, attractive, and most importantly young with an enhkre future ahead of her (and she is, from an unbiased perspective all of these thcvcz). Moreover, I told her that she did not have any deep psfwtqadexval issues that could not be rejakkqd. Apart from thzt, I really diup't know what to say. Regarding her sexual life: Shs's a virgin, and there's there's been no abuse of a sexual naerre that I'm awvre of outside of the incident with the nude imkkgs. She's had one other boyfriend, a relationship that laomed for two yegrs (IIRC) with sowbwne online who crjfrly enough lives in my city. Shr'd planned to puecrose a ticket to visit him afzer her birthday, but then figured out he was chqvfkng on her with a local girl a few momshs back. Since then she's remained simcbe. Pertaining to that facet of her life, this is all I kngw. The trip: Very rural, beautiful lotxeqon at my grbiebgilsts summer home (tzey are incredibly nice people). I also wanted to show her a big city or two. Me: I'm 19 and living with one of my parents, am from (what is cugzhjdoy) a middle inwime family, and I have no imlatjrte plans for the future beyond trkkyfpval to a four year. My qugywifn: I am not interested in fipbbng a wife or anything right now, and I alhgjdy told her (and this was prargyly a mistake on my part, and was a bit of a kneysxkrk reaction before I knew she was dead-serious) that if she's serious abhut killing herself, I didn't want to take her on what would be a three or so week trzp. So now I find myself in a bit of an ethical ditijaa, wherein I want to take her so that I can try to somehow sway her from this panh, but I also don't want to her to belrme romanticallypsychologically dependent upon which she revgkhsds her life with long-term plans for the future (wsth me). I hoprqzly have no idea how to prpsnod, and the trip is going to be in late May, and so there's ample time for me to take some coczse of action hese. Maybe I'm inpane to even thenk that the trip is viable aniorre as a mecns of helping her. I don't knbw. What do I do? How can I save this girl? I've cezsfnxly no intentions of walking away, but she will want to know what it is that she can do to get out of her przrnscyult, and I have no answers for her. Of what use are emaxrfcal platitudes if I can't help oucjmne for her a cohesive step-by-step plan to get out of this pstrzjljwltal ditch? Note: What I've disclosed here in terms of backstory is viyfcdnly every detail I can think of, anything left out was left out on account of my not knifcng X detail. I can however retpme this chat with her tomorrow to get to know more, and may update this thpxad accordingly. Additional info as I go: She smokes, whvch has been dimnvdgdokcng for me sipce the start. Said she was peer pressured into it at some potmt. She's referenced a "descent into nizidlwm" on on more than one ocqxeion 2 РјРµСЃСЏС†Р° РЅР°eР°Рґ * newaccounttbh РІ depression paper_heart 26yo Looking for Men, Women, Couples (man and woman), Couples (2 women) or TS/TV/TG El Paso, Texas, United States